What do you want your life to feel like and look like? What is the life that you used to dream of and perhaps feel so far away from right now? Don’t worry if you are unsure and confused about what you want, I am here to bring you back to yourself in a deeply connected way.
Finding your own version of success and personal achievement and making your dreams your reality.
Your own version of success gives you life force energy, as do your dreams and aspirations! However most of us who are looking for ways to achieve what we want are not getting what we want and that is because of the obstacles that are in our way! You may or may not be able to identify where or what these blockages are on a conscious level. They can feel like impossible hurdles to climb over making it seem like our dream life is far far away when actually, if you know how to navigate the mind on a scientific level, it really isn’t that far out of reach at all!
The subconscious part of the brain wants to keep us safe. Any obstacles that may be preventing our dreams from becoming a reality is in this bit right here! There is good reason why our subconscious has steered us away from anything close to what we think we actually want to be doing and that is due to a negative experience from the past that has been logged as a ‘Never allow anything remotely similar or the same to happen again’ on it’s very sophisticated (and quite ancient!) operating system. A perceived threat is gong to be avoided like the plague unless we go and clear things up a bit!
Perceived threat and unresolved emotions
Memories that are stored deep in our brains that we aren’t consciously aware of carry trapped emotions. First is the event or interaction, then comes our thought or trauma response, then the emotion. These are the kinks that did not get to be honoured or decided by us. There may have been times when we had to neglect our own feelings for safety but perhaps now you are safe they have been making a noise, asking to be healed.
For example If, as a child, we had held frustration about something and that frustration was not met or acknowledged by our caregiver then it may still be within you today. Frustration may be in the background or much louder in the foreground of your life right now!! It could be showing up in your tone of voice towards your spouse or keeping you wide awake at night.
It may not have been safe for you to stop and digest what was going on in a past experience and so your response may have been in ‘freeze’ mode. We carry trauma with us until we feel it is safe to get support and then healing can take place but as a coping mechanism our clever brains will protect us from ‘feeling’ until then. This may show up in our present day as disconnected to our children for example or unable to form attachments in relationships. It can manifest in our physical bodies if it has been bottled up inside of us-usually when it is safer to be vulnerable. Of course this is our clever physiology wanting to release and shed the past -not continue on a debilitating journey.
Trauma and healing in the brain
Any event that we perceived at the time as unsafe to feel our feelings can be a trauma to us. Many of us were not taught to honour our feelings, more to consider others and be aware of our manners in public. Some of the kinks in our records from the past are bigger and much uglier. We will most probably know the scene of the crime in our conscious memory and will try hard to keep ourselves afloat in our present life today. There are many wonderful practices that can support us in our every day lives such as affirmations. Affirmations for example are a great tool to have, yet every day you have to start again to get to that same level that you achieved the day before. If our baseline stays the same then our lives stay the same.
It effects you every day and every day you show up. You may feel numb, detached and just going through the motions. You might be feeling drained and exhausted just from doing so. You’re more than likely struggling to sleep well as you continue to fight the traumatic experience from your door.
The thing with trauma is that it wants to be healed! I like to think of it in two ways….ONE- It will get louder and louder until we finally address it. This happens as we get older and I believe why the menopause sometimes carry some harsh symptoms for some ladies and not that many for others! Why we may develop chronic illness or conditions in the body…TO MAKE US LISTEN!
We all have a capacity bucket. As the bucket is filled and never emptied it reaches tipping point. When your bucket is very full the sleeping process of REM (Rapid eye movement-the part in our cycle that allows us to feel like we have slept well-we need about x5 per night)cannot occur due to the immense energy that is being consumed from the bucket. The REM needs energy to perform its task. So our nervous system is hijacked even further with a lack of sleep. So we are in heightened fear and anxiety mode.
Trauma can absolutely be healed. Scientifically the parts of our brains that are hugely effected by trauma can be reversed. We have the flexibility to create new pathways and heal. Memories are not erased at all but we do get to eradicate the markers that created the trauma response in our individual experiences thus smoothing the kink out and allowing our record to spin smoothly in our present life.
The conscious part of our brain and the subconscious are two parts of our brain that are literally on opposing sides and the safety inspector always wins!!
This is not something that any of us are aware of and it can be a bit tricky to comprehend! Of course you intend to get what you want and so why would you be jeopardizing that from actually happening?! Well, you would be surprised to know that you most probably are- unless of course you have everything that you want!!
A certain career, business success, personal achievements, relationships, marriage prospects, friendships, children, family…this list is non exhaustive!
The results from my practices have been amazing and in fact some of the hurdles that people can face are on a debilitating physical level such as extreme fatigue, Fibromyalgia, trapped nerves, muscle strains, menstrual cramps and menopausal symptoms to name a few. When emotional pain is left in the body it can manifest on a physical level. So you may also be surprised to know that any of these more physical hurdles are also an attempt in keeping you safe-and definitely away from your dream life.
The choices we make are navigated by the deep programming within the subconscious and these choices that we make dictate how our life looks and feels.
